What Will I Be Asked On That Day?

Handsome! Every morning when I meet with God, I go to a spot where I can be in His presence without having to worry if anyone could overhear me. I found a bench just by the beach & by about 6:40am, I would stumble out of bed, grab my Bible & traverse at first light to make my blurry eyed way to my meeting place. All of a sudden, it rained feathers. I can explain this! The feathers were probably trapped in the tree branches when the peacocks fly over the roof(yes, they can fly) & happened to be dislodged just as I walked beneath them so it made my day to gather them! The night before, I was feeling quite overwhelmed by the prospect of my dad dying at home. And I’m here. Don’t ask me why I’m not at home by his bedside. I spent his birthday with him on the 18th & he was giving me last wishes instead of birthday wishes. I asked him how he felt about leaving this world & us. He said he felt peace. He only became a Christian 2 years ago. So has mum. Then my dive manager, Sam, walked in on me. Teary eyed & all. I think I’d stunned him. As he tried to reason with me & consoled me, I thought to myself, well, I’ve got to let go & let God. I’m going to have a lot of things to ask God about this & wanted to bring to His attention that I was feeling despaired over my beloved daddy. Then Bernard, the sous chef, came in with his guitar & sang me some songs that lifted my spirit. And that night, we committed it to God by praying for wisdom to know what He has us here for. Arriving at my bench of petition, there laid on the ground beside the bench, a long & beautiful peacock feather. Placed in such a way that I could never miss. Maybe God put it there to stop me from chasing the peacocks, telling them to ‘DROP FEATHER!’ before its time. It made me feel better already. At the very moment I ask for God’s presence, a black egret would fly just above the surface of the sea across me to land at the foundation of the jetty. Every day. Without fail. I thought it was a coincidence but I varied my waking hours between 6am & 6:45am. The moment I invite God’s presence, that egret will fly by me & rests on the jetty. Cool….. So if you ask me why I would give up the conveniences of high speed broadband & wifi in my favourite coffee joint, chilling at my humble abode facing a lush tropical jungle with civet cats, Racquet-Tailed Drongos, Woody Woodpeckers, Owls & neighbours who are resting in peace, gallivanting with TV Smith, well, I’ll tell you this, I haven’t spent enough time with God to warrant a retreat so He brought me here where all I could do is watch His magnificent creation all around me & say THANK YOU. The joy that comes from knowing that He has provided all things for the good of those who love Him & live according to His purpose. I’d been sent birds & butterflies! God is everywhere!
Butterfly Beneath Then I asked God if I were to meet Him now instead of my dad, what would He be asking me? I continued to ponder over the question even after I left the bench an hour later. Then an email I’d received contained the answers that I’d asked…… God won't ask what kind of car you drove. He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation. God won't ask the square footage of your house, He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home. God won't ask about the clothes you had in your closet, He'll ask how many you helped to clothe. God won't ask what your highest salary was. He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it. God won't ask what your job title was. He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability. God won't ask how many friends you had. He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend. God won't ask what neighbourhood you lived in, He'll ask how you treated your neighbours. God won't ask about the colour of your skin,

He'll ask about the content of your character.

God won't ask how good YOU were; He'll ask if you believed in His Son who is the BEST. God won't have to ask how many people you have decided to give the good news to, He already knows your decision.

Peacock's Pride

Since I got here, I noticed the peacocks had been roaming freely. The feathers are all stacked to make the patterns homogenous & uniformed. It’s like someone’s work of art on these birds as no two are alike. And they moult. I’d developed a favourite pastime of collecting their feathers, long, short & fluffy. Some of these are sitting between the pages of my Bible. Bookmark And with every find, I chuckle with glee, knowing that I’m competing with the rest of the resort staff who are also vying for this prized possession. Hahaha! The moulting process enables them to grow newer & more elaborate feathers. So the existing feathers make way when their time is up. What a splendid process. I have feathers all over my room now. The Deck Divers who come here, ask me how I can move from bustling KL city to a laidback idyllic island living. A girl friend whom I had met briefly before, was surprised to find me here too. I tell them that I am adjusting but the pace is still the same for me. The only thing I have to contend with is the non-availability of the usual convenience of midnight dining at mamak stalls. And the friends who would be awake to be there for you. Diver friends call me to give me encouragement & the inspiration to write. I needed it. Thank you, Eng Hoo, for believing in me in this occasionally lonely place. Then I told them of the birds that visit me are not the usual kind nowadays. I have three eagles atop the tallest trees in the jungle behind me, peacocks all around me & a rooster that likes to chill out at my balcony. Then the common mynahs will squeak when the monitor lizard emerges from below my chalet. The two dogs from the neighbours will roam into our place & I have access to so many pets in a gigantic marine aquarium that houses fearless Sergeant Majors & Cleaner Wrasses!! Ok, so I miss church & fellowship but I also get to meet people from all walks of life. We have had stories from a freight forwarder who transported dolphins to the Singapore Underwater World from Thailand. The whole operation was an intensive-care affair. Then we have the host of the Survivor series coming here to go diving with us. Shortly after, I met Erhling Wahlgren, former Mr. Universe! Who needs the city? My Daily Visitor So I have prided myself above the average city slicker (that I was) to come to this island & operate the dive centre with an equally if not more, proud city slicker of Singapore, my dive manager, Sam. Gene, a long time friend & fellow instructor, laughed himself silly when he found out. He didn’t think I could manage the compressor breakdown (if any) or the equipment breakdown (heaven forbids…) & asked me how I was going to manage them. Kaseng, my associate/godfather/guardian, interjected with “she’ll pick up her phone & call for help!” Swanky! That’s why I hired Sam. Life is never going to be the same again. When I made arrangements to cook our own meals, a friend enroute here kindly fulfilled my groceries request. Well, chocolates aren’t exactly groceries but they are my happy food. I got succulent grapes, a 300 thread count per square inch pillowcase & bonito flakes among others, to add onto my feel good therapy! Is he going to be the charming prince who rescues the princess from being marooned? I don’t feel marooned but it’s nice to make believe that I live in a fantasy once in awhile. Castle in a faraway land, an army of guards & servants. A tyrant king guided by an evil prime minister. And me? Stuck in the garden with my Golden Retriever & hornbill. Of course, ideally it should be pet tiger & a macaw but I’m being a bit realistic here. It would be better if this prince believed in Christ & walk in His ways. Maybe he was sent to be a distraction from the better things to come? Maybe he’s been sent by a competitor who’s got high stakes on a bet between themselves. Whatever it is, the last thing on my mind is to let a bet get in the way of friendship if friendship is what the friend is after. If the bet is really what this friend wants to win, then he would have lost the opportunity of my friendship. The Beach Relationships used to take up much of my time & effort as I’d placed so much emphasis on them. After going through life being single, I think I have an idea of what my soul mate would be. He will have to look like a peacock to impress me, drop life’s burdens no matter how much significance they hold like the moulting feathers, be ready to accept the period of looking bald & incomplete until the new feathers with greater magnificence grow out to replace the old. He must be monogamous like the macaws too. Tall order. Well, they say nothing is impossible with God. Just as He had arranged all the feathers to a pattern, numbered the hairs on our heads, letting a Godly man find me is like discovering my peacock feathers. Not knowing which peacock had dropped its’ feathers, chancing upon it is already an excitement. How the feather got there would be the adventure I’d live to tell my descendants, hopefully, in my garden full of flowers, hornbills & macaws, a Golden Retriever & God.

Milestone In My Life

Whenever I purchase an orchid plant at the nurseries, it is to mark a turning point in my life. This time is my relocation. This orchid costs RM90. It was so unique that it caught my eye but I thought it would be better to purchase a young plant & nurture it till it flowers. Still, it set me back RM16. And it’s growing roots now....

Ring of Hope

Sometimes, when things don’t happen the way they should, the first response we have is that of anger & frustration. On the Labour Day weekend, the boat was to depart at six am, so we were told. The group of volunteers who came in the night before, barely had five hours of sleep when I jolted them up to catch the early ferry to Tioman. When the group of 12 of us arrived at the jetty at 5:45am, the ferry had left without us, citing the tides going out had to be challenged if they were to make it. Being told that the ferry service for all the days were fully booked, our hopes were dashed when we got stranded there. We arranged with the transport company to accommodate the twelve of us for a later trip when the tides rose again. Kaseng, my associate/advisor/godfather/mentor, lost his cool but I just kept silent & apologised for the delay & asked the volunteers to proceed for breakfast instead. So we ate. And we talked. We got acquainted very quickly. Audrey & Kok Cheong, friends of Wai Min, a Reccie(term used for recreational diver), had established themselves as Christians at the beginning of the conversation & before you know it, it was almost 8am. Then Aaron Tee straddles in to say hello, barefooted, drenched in mud & stank. Hahaha, a forumer in all his splendour! “Aaron, what’s wrong with you?” “Our speedboat got stuck in the sand. So are the other speedboats while trying to get to the big ferry. I walked back to get breakfast for the rest!” A blessing in disguise. We cheered so loudly, we didn’t realise we got stares. God had kept all of us from the arduous journey to the sandbanks of Mersing rivermouth. By the time the boat transported us out to the main ferry, it was 10am. We only got to our destination at almost 1:30pm. You'd think that the Mersing boat operators would be familiar with the waterways since they've been at it for years but no. They are mercilessly caught because the shifting sands just cover up the route that they thought was passable. What's happening to the widening of the river or reinforcement on the banks? The digging up of the waterway??? In my humble opinion, they are digging a deeper grave for themselves. So our plans got delayed but we were spared from having to get down to push the boat as Aaron was also seen doing after we rode pass them to get to the ferry. I couldn’t imagine then, what would have happened if we were laden with problems at the start of the trip & the possibility of sending everyone back because there wasn’t space in the ferry. Well, the mission has to go on. We were to salvage corals & replant them. There’s something about community living that brings out the best in everyone. God never intended for man to live alone. Again, the public holiday-long weekend problem of not having enough rooms caused the four of us, Sam, Dengy, Ricac & I, to bunk in one room. Audrey, Ricac & I talked about issues that surround our lives. We laughed at the propositions I’d received in my life as a female instructor. We also talked about lost love. Ricac hadn’t heard anything like it before, about the way we solve our problems through Christ. She said it’s as if we depended solely upon His existence & power to live each day. She’s not far from the truth. If we are to be the light & salt of the world, we must first learn to live the way that God had intended for us to live…..by faith. The coral rescue mission is another topic altogether but I figured God had used this opportunity to put desires in Kok Cheong’s heart to dive again after a lapse of 7 years, to send Audrey to minister to me. In return, I took care of Kok Cheong akin to bringing a kid sight-seeing underwater! Uprooting from KL to the islands meant time away from fellowship with my Christian cellgroup & performing arts practices. I asked God if He really wanted me to go before I packed my bags & when I opened the Bible, He sent me to Psalm 107….

O give thanks to Jehovah, for He is good; for His mercy endures forever. Let the redeemed of Jehovah say so, whom He has redeemed from the hand of the enemy, and gathered them out of the lands, from the east, and from the west, from the north, and from the south. They wandered in the wilderness, in a desert by the way; they found no city to dwell in. Hungry and thirsty, their soul fainted in them. Then they cried to Jehovah in their distress, and He delivered them out of their troubles. And He guided them by the right way, so as to go to a city to live in. Oh that men would praise Jehovah for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the sons of man! For He satisfies the thirsty soul, and fills the hungry soul with good. Those who sit in the darkness and in the shadow of death, being chained in affliction and iron; because they rebelled against the Words of God, and despised the advice of the Most High. and He humbled their heart with labor; they fell down, and none was helping. Then they cried to Jehovah in their distress, and He saved them out of their troubles. He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death, and broke their bands in two. Let them praise Jehovah for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the sons of man! For He has broken the gates of bronze, and cut the bars of iron in two. Fools are afflicted because of their rebellion, and because of their iniquities. Their soul hates all kinds of food; and they draw near the gates of death. Then they cry to Jehovah in their distress, and He saves them out of their troubles. He sent His Word and heals them, and delivers them from their pitfalls. Let them praise Jehovah for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the sons of man! And let them sacrifice the sacrifices of thanksgiving, and declare His works with rejoicing! They who go down to the sea in ships, who do business in great waters; these see the works of Jehovah and His wonders in the deep. For He commands and raises the stormy wind, which lifts up its waves. They mount up to the heavens, they go down again to the depths; their soul is melted because of trouble. They reel to and fro, and stagger like a drunken man, and all their wisdom is swallowed up. And they cry to Jehovah in their trouble, and He brings them out of their troubles. He makes the storm a calm, so that its waves are still. And they are glad because they are quiet; so He brings them to their desired haven. Let them praise Jehovah for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the sons of man! And let them exalt Him in the congregation of the people, and praise Him in the gathering of the elders. He sets rivers to a wilderness and water-springs to thirsty ground; a fruitful land to a salty desert, because of the wickedness of those who dwell in it. He turns the wilderness into water-ponds, and dry ground into water-springs. And He makes the hungry dwell there, so that they may prepare a city to live in; and sow the fields, and plant vineyards, which may yield fruits of increase. He also blesses them, so that they are multiplied greatly; and does not allow their cattle to become few. Again, they have become few, and humbled through harshness, affliction, and sorrow. He pours scorn on nobles, and causes them to wander in the wilderness, where there is no path. But He raises up the poor from affliction and sets families like a flock. The upright shall see and rejoice; and all iniquity shall stop its mouth. Whoever is wise, and will observe these things, they shall understand the mercies of Jehovah.

What a direct order this is. I know I would be starved of spiritual food but God had placed a worship leader there ahead of me. Morie would play the piano & we would sing together. Singing alone wouldn’t suffice. We need ministry. And God sent Audrey to encourage me to stand firm in Him. At the end of the trip, when we reached the Tioman jetty for our ride back, there was an eagle looming ahead about to zoom in on its’ prey in the water. We stood in awe at the sheer size of that eagle with a wingspan of 1.5metres. The moment the eagle succeeded at its attempt to catch fish, it headed straight for the trees above the hills. Audrey asked me how long we’d met & I replied three days. She took out a ring that she had made using Swarovski crystals & presented it to me. I was moved beyond words. She said, “This is our engagement ring for you to keep your spirits high as you work unto the Lord & to serve Him in days to come. We hope this would encourage you to look ahead of any adversities you may face!” That same night, the chapter I read in Job 9:22 – 35 talked about the things I’d witnessed in the day…

It is One, therefore I said, He is consuming the perfect and the wicked. If the whip kills suddenly, He will mock at the calamity of the innocent. The earth is given into the hand of the wicked; He covers the faces of its judges; if it is not He, then who is it? Now my days are swifter than a runner; they flee away, they see no good. They have passed away like the swift ships; like the eagle who swoops on the prey. If I say, I will forget my complaint, I will depart from my heaviness and be of good cheer, I am afraid of all my sorrows; I know that You will not hold me innocent. I have been condemned; why then should I labour in vain? If I wash myself with snow water, and make my hands ever so clean, yet You will plunge me into the ditch and my own clothes shall despise me. For He is not a man, as I am, that I should answer Him, that we should come together in judgment; there is no mediator between us, who might lay his hand on us both. Let Him take His rod away from me, and let not His fear make me afraid; then would I speak and not fear Him; for it is not so with me.

Thank you, Lord Jesus, for sending Audrey & Kok Cheong my way, an encounter that rings hope & increases faith to prepare me for the plan that You have laid out for me. Amen.

Quiet Time Visitor